Ahhhh, the holidays are upon us. Somehow time seems to start flying at warp speed this time of year. It’s the season of more. Do more, eat more, buy more, party more, drink more, stress more.
More is not always better it’s just, well, more!
The pressure to do more comes at a price. It means less time to do the things that nourish us and can leave us operating from a place of depletion and not from a place of joy and fulfillment. That’s why is super important to be super discerning about your needs and desires!
What does it mean to be discerning? According to Merriam Webster, discerning is showing insight and understanding; discriminating. It is synonymous with perceptive, sensitive, selective, eagle-eyed, observant, being aware of. It means keeping our receptors up so we can stay tuned into our own needs to ensure they don’t fall to the bottom of the list.
Learning to say no is not always easy, especially during the holidays when we don’t want to disappoint anyone or we feel obligated to say yes. But remember, if we don’t take care of ourselves – by practicing self-love, creating good boundaries, and choosing how best to spend our energy – no one else will. Eventually, we will become depleted and grumpy which doesn’t serve anyone in the long run.
This is your one precious life and you are allowed to say no and take care of yourself. Use this filter when making decisions such as social gatherings invites, shopping for gifts, eating – if it not a definite yes, then it’s a NO! That’s it, simple but not always easy.
Being discerning with yourself and how you spend your energy is not selfish. It is an act of self-love. Why? Because when you say no to the things that don’t resonate with you, you open space to say to the things that do. When you turn on to your own desires, your light shines. When you allow your light to shine, you not only give others around you permission to do the same, YOU light up the world around you.
When you love and take care of yourself, you are actually helping those around you!
“If enough of us embrace love, the world will eventually be saturated with love. The love in the world begins with the love within ourselves.” ~Deepak Chopra
It’s easy to misinterpret self-love with being selfish or narcissistic. According to Christine Arylo, author of Madly in Love with Me – The Daring Adventure of Becoming Your Own Best Friend, loving yourself is not something you do instead of loving others, loving yourself is the prerequisite to loving others.
Having trouble with this whole self-love thing? Remind yourself – “only good can come to me and others from my choosing to love myself…”
When we learn to shed love on ourselves, we increase our capacity to share love and receive love from others. In my opinion, that is the best gift that we can give to all those we love, including ourselves and the whole wide world!
And the world needs more love now more than ever. Remember that tune by Hal David and Burt Bacharach? Listen to it performed here by Dionne Warwick.
“What the world needs now is love, sweet love
It’s the only thing that there’s just too little of
What the world needs now is love, sweet love
No, not just for some but for everyone”
PS – Everyone includes YOU!!!
Don’t get caught up in the frenzy. Check in with yourself. Keep your antenna’s up. Stay perceptive, sensitive, selective, eagle-eyed, observant, and aware of your needs and desires. Most of all be discerning and keep the volume of your sweet self-love turned on – full blast!
